sanity
the quality or state of being sane; especially : soundness or health of mind
So I feel in recent days that I have fallen pretty short of being what the dictionary calls "sane" at times. I feel like my world is spinning around faster than I can handle and I can't do anything to slow it down. I want so badly to enjoy this time of my life...my engagement...getting ready for this wedding...friends and family showering their love on us. I know I will never be able to rewind and come back to this time period. I just fear I am letting the stress of work, relationships and this big event steal my joy.
I am trying so hard to not let the little things overwhelm me. I'm trying so hard to delegate and let other people help me. That's a hard one to swallow. I can do it all...can't I? I've always done it all myself. Surely I can make this happen. I can work long hours and get the job done. I can plan this wedding and keep everyone in the loop. I can organize this whole event...no problem! Max and I - we keep truckin along. I can keep a smile on my face everyday and keep my cool when times are tough. I can "change my bracelet" only a couple times a day and be good. I can balance the world. That is...until it all comes crumbling down and I have another meltdown.
Well, I'm here to say...I refuse to let my joy be taken away from me!! I refuse to be controlled by meltdowns and emotional outbreaks. Oh people, if you are reading this...pray for me PLEASE!! I need so desperately to feel sane and not to feel like I am spiraling downward. 5 weeks from tonight, I will be married and dancing the night away. I can't wait for that day when I will finally be someone's wife. I am loved by the most amazing man in the world and I couldn't be more blessed. He is incredible. I am so ready to commit my life to him before God and all of our family and friends. So let's get rid of the stress and hurry this night along.
I'm sorry for anyone who has crossed the path where I've been throwing rocks. By no means have I meant to hurt anyone. Thank you in advance for the grace that you have shown me. I appreciate it more than you know.
So I say to myself..."Just breathe, Sara, just breathe."
skip to main |
skip to sidebar
Our life should be a reflection of Christ. From the beginning we were created by God to live a life pleasing to Him. My prayer is that everyday I am a mere reflection of what He has created me to be in Jesus, living and believing who He says He is and that He can do what He says He can do.
1 comment:
Most brides don't realize this until the day of the wedding. You're getting it out of the way now. Good girl. My prayers are with you. Just remember about the important parts of the wedding and the marriage that follows. Little details will either not happen or work themselves out. You're great!
Post a Comment